I was eating breakfast with my friend, suddenly, we saw a black wallet on the floor. Then we started to think whether should we pick it up or not. Based on our good-hearted personalities, we decided to return the wallet back to the person.
I picked up the wallet and opened it, we tried to find the person's ID card or student card, then we found "his" ID card and student card. We were happy about that we can do a good thing.
Helping people is a great thing, I love to help people as more as possible, I'm not sure whether can I get feedback or not, but I will feel satisfied by doing those things. Finally, I sent the wallet to the school's lost-and-found, I hope he will take it back soon.
2 則留言:
Your first sentence contains a comma splice, the comma between "friend" and "suddenly". That should be a period.
"Based on our good-hearted personalities," is verbose. All you need to say is "Because we are honest and good-hearted,". I think you need to say "honest" here. Even a thief can be good-hearted in certain circumstances.
"return the wallet back to the person" contains two errors. "Return" means "give back", so it includes the notion of "back". Second, "the person" is meaningless; this has to be "its owner" or, verbosely, "the person it belonged to".
"We were happy about that we can do a good thing" should be "We were happy about being able to do a good thing".
Another comma splice: "lost-and-found, I hope"
And another meaningless reference: "he will take it back soon". This should be "I hope the owner claims his wallet soon".
Still and all, however, your meanings are clear.
I just noticed that you, too, are 10 days behind on your posts. You're in trouble.
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